Issue Number: Volume VIII No. 7 Publisher: Kituku & Associates
Date of Issue: July 2009.  © 2009—Overcoming Buffaloes in Our Lives. All Rights Reserved.

... What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such. - Henry Miller

Look at this box carefully.

What do you see inside?
Can you see a BLACK DOT?

Is that all you see inside the box?

If your response is yes, you can see a black dot and that’s all you see, you are not alone. And that is sad news.

What you focus on at work and in life largely determines your attitude, your ability to stay creative, how soon you can leave the past behind and your growth in key aspects of life regardless of the prevailing circumstances.

Since 1998, I have conducted a simple survey at many of my presentations to illustrate the importance of turning setbacks or change into steppingstones to a new beginning. I pick up a white piece of paper (either a standard 8.5 x 11 or a larger one depending of the number of people present) and scribble a visible dot. I then ask the audience what they can see. The very first response, without fail, is a black dot.

Sometimes, I have people privately write down what they can see. The overwhelming majority, sometimes as high as 90%, write that they can see the black dot, and nothing else.
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You can imagine the facial expressions and/or deep breaths taken when I ask the audience, “How come you didn’t see the white space surrounding the black dot?” A participant once asked, “Were we supposed to see that, too?”

The majority of us, unfortunately, focus on the dots of our lives. But did you know that, on average, 98% of the time good things happen? And still, we focus on the 2% when things don’t go our way, when natural forces or man/woman made factors change our lives.

Speakers are likely to focus on the two negative evaluation forms instead of the 98 positive ones. A leader can use two to three incidents a year to deny an employee a positive evaluation or a promotion. You can work with someone for seven years but what you remember the most are the few moments when there were conflicts. Married people know very well that you can spend a day harmoniously together, maybe at the beach, but around 5:00 p.m., you say one sentence in the wrong way and that is what is remembered.

Focusing on the past or a negative experience is the best way to waste energy and resources. When you focus on the setbacks of life, you are likely to blame others, become less creative, be more defensive, waste energy and resources and keep yourself stuck in your mindset. When focusing on setbacks becomes a habit, it leads to business failure, broken relationships, failed careers and regret.

When you focus on the 98% of life that is good, you have a positive attitude and accept reality with a resolve to make things better. You see what’s working and think about involving others. You are building an optimistic environment that fosters strong relationships, creativity, enthusiasm and personal and professional growth.

Every day you wake up, you have a choice to make. Are you going to focus on the dot or on the 98% goodness of life?

Sometimes that “dot” is what helps us improve. Reward the one unsatisfied customer who tells you his/her bad experience with your services/products—because probably there were many others who just kept quiet after swearing never to do business with you again. The question then is:
Have you focused on the few failing experiences of the past, thus jeopardizing your ability to enjoy today and have a better tomorrow?
Do you, as a leader focus on isolated employee incidents or on the overall performance?
As a salesperson, are you focused on (and disappointed by) the few potential customers who can’t close the deal with you or on the open market that awaits your call?
Is your attitude negative because you focus on the lack of a few material items or a job title instead of the many blessings you have that millions of people wish they could have for a day?
Does your day’s productivity suffer because you focus on a single setback instead of focusing on all the other things that are just fine?
As a parent, do you focus on your child’s grades only or do you consider his or her overall performance (responsible, respectful, trustworthy, self-initiating or team player) in life?
Are your relationships turbulent because you focus on a few situations when you were disappointed?

The long awaited opportunity will happen for you and your spouse on September 23rd 2009. So prepare yourselves for one amazing day and be ready to rejuvenate your married life. Over a decade, Dr. Vincent Kituku has conducted marriage seminars in more states than he has given his captivating keynotes that propelled him to international fame.

Without ever sending a flyer or a single announcement, Dr. Kituku has consistently been invited to strengthen marriages as well as prepare those about to marry with his fresh and proven strategies of building strong marriages and healthy families.

But before you continue, here is what Gary Smalley, world renowned Author and International speaker on family relationships said about the marriage book written by Dr. Kituku:

Overcoming Buffaloes in Marriage is a fresh approach with time-tested principles… Dr. Kituku, a native of Kenya, uses analogy after analogy to help married couples and those preparing to marry to make their relationship a priority.

You know that today’s marriages fail because of:

Spouses blaming each other or being blamed for simple mistakes

Lukewarm or non-existent sex lives

Money related stress

Strained communication, fear of how to talk to your spouse


In-laws who have cut inroads into your relationship and how you live your married lives

Differences on how to raise children, discipline, values and living with purpose

Work, hobbies and other extramarital aspects that take time from each other

If you don’t want your marriage to be a victim of any of the above, then Overcoming Buffaloes in Marriage (How to Grow Together, Build a Bond that Money and Communication Issues Can’t Break, Maintain a Vibrant Sex Life and Raise Respectful and Goal Oriented Children) is the marriage seminar you need.

The fresh easy-to-apply lessons Dr. Kituku provides with his succinct inspirational lessons and his authentic power of storytelling will help you learn:

How to say, “You are special” without giving any diamonds

How to respectfully communicate under all circumstances

Proven practices that will your keep sex life alive

Why and how to prevent money and material possessions from becoming sources of your marital anguish


To raise children who respect Dad and Mom, are self confident and hard workers

How to balance work and life without leaving your family behind

How to value and keep in-laws from destroying your marriage


Vincent confronts the threats to oneness in marriage, the need for effective communication to avoid conflict, the threat of material possessions, and satisfying sex life in marriage. These aspects of marriage are addressed by examples of his own life experiences in Africa and the US…These entertaining, and at times humorous, stories have a positive impact on married couples of any age. Troubled marriages will be revived and good marriages enhanced when the spouses understand the basics of love, honor and respect.

Robert Friesen

Dr. Kituku will also share his sought after
7 Romantic Tips for Married Men Who Want to Be Happy and Successful

Please note: This seminar is for couples (husbands and wives) and/or betrothed couples who are preparing to marry. Space is limited.

The first 119 couples to register invest only $69 per couple
SAVE $100!
Groups of FIVE sets of couples or more register for $59/couple
if registered before midnight August 23rd.

Principal Speaker:
Dr. Vincent Muli Kituku, international speaker and author
Keynote Speaker:
Patricia Kempthrone, Former first lady and founder of the Twiga Foundation
for balancing work and life.
September 23rd 2009   8:30am- 4:00pm
Nampa Civic Center
ALL attendees will receive a free workbook ($19 value)
The first 119 couples will get a free:

Dr. and Mrs. Kituku’s Cookbook of African Special and Common
Recipes … Christmases in Kangundo & What We Ate In Between ($14.99 value)

I Stopped Raising Angels: How to Raise Children With Human
Characteristics ($20)

A poster of the Top 45 Must Know Life Lessons for Top Achievers
($5 but priceless)
Your investment:
$69 Per Couple This offer expires immediately after 119 couples have registered.
$99 Per Couple BEFORE Midnight August 23rd 2009
$169 Per Couple AFTER August 23rd 2009
For group discounts and economic hardship scholarships
please call our office at (208) 376-8724. Lunch is not included.

Military personnel (active or retired), please call our office for special rates.
There is also a discounted investment for church groups.

Toll free 1-888-685-1621 to register by phone


Mail a check or money order to:

P.O. Box 7152
Boise, Idaho 83707

You can also use your credit card to register when you call our office.

Don’t be one of the 75-80% professionals
who wake up and wish they didn’t have
to do a job they dislike.

Read how to overcome your “social buffaloes” from Dr. Kituku, who has been called a modern day “King Solomon” for his in-depth understanding of workplace and personal life challenges and his unequaled use of stories and proven, easy to use strategies
to help you:

Move forward without leaving your life behind
Learn how to set yourself apart at work and in life
Rediscover talents and resources you need for growth
Thrive by repeatedly providing exceptional service
Be part of something bigger than a career
Bounce back after setbacks

Overcoming Buffaloes at Work & in Life will equip you and your organization. Overcoming Buffaloes at Work & in Life provides practical tools to help individuals, corporations, public and nonprofit organizations, teams and families increase productivity, provide exceptional customer service, and stay motivated and focused. The fresh ideas in this book will take
you to new heights of work experiences without leaving your life behind.

Book specifications:
ISBN: 978-1-60585-958-3
Hardcover with glossy dust jacket, 5.5 by 8.5
112 pages
Retail price:
$19.99 US   $25.99 Canada

Take advantage of this month’s special.
Buy ONE book and receive the following FREE of charge

Overcoming Buffaloes as a Leader:
What you need to inspire productivity, focus, team spirit
    and positive attitudes
Top 45 Must Know Lessons for Top Achievers
 (a popular inspirational poster for all ages)

Unfortunately we have limited packages for this offer.
Expires on July 11th Midnight
or when the sets we have are gone!

Call toll free 1-888 685-1621 and ask for the midsummer special offer.
All major credit cards are accepted!

Read what others are saying:

Vincent, thanks for leaving me a signed copy of your book!...God’s timing was perfect (again). I took that book and read it while on a church mission trip in Mexico (building houses in Reynosa)…and it became sort of a daily devotion and it put a lot of things in perspective…

Jim Gilchriest
Executive News Director, KTVB News Group

Hi Vincent…I have almost finished reading the book, which so far I have enjoyed and is certainly in line with the changes we are striving to make here at Bartercard...

National Franchising Manager, Bartercard Australia Pty Ltd

…So you are right. The best gift is to have daddy home. Time with family is much more important than any material things that fathers can provide. More dads need to read Chapt. 30…I have been trying to find a way to involve dads in the school learning process. The NFL has a program and I have looked into some others. Hopefully, with the encouragement you provide in this book, I can finally get something started…May God richly bless you in your work! Also: Could you send me 2 more copies of the book Overcoming Buffaloes…

Rick Bollman
Principal Cynthia Mann Elementary School

…I was moved immediately as I read a portion of the "9 Must Know Lessons..." booklet. I loaded the CD and listened all the way through as I looked up your website online. Obviously I was very affected and wanted to let you know right away. In an effort to help others feel similarly impressed, I wonder what your options for keynote or short motivational seminars might be…

Teresa Schwarz
Blue Cross of Idaho


James G. Murray

Good afternoon Vincent…We would still like to purchase 200 books from you to give to our delegates…

Anna Parfrey
Executive Assistant to Justine Hayek
National Franchising Manager, Bartercard Australia Pty Ltd



It has been said that you may be a nobody to the world, but to somebody you are the world. To understand what to be somebody truly means, one must experience unconditional love in his or her most vulnerable moment. That love might be the only thread to hold on to as the wounded soul navigates through the tides of life to a renewed hope and focused sense of purpose.

One of the largely unknown aspects of building a professional speaking/training career is that an individual must pay his dues in the school of hard knocks. Lack of business and name recognition is the force that demand astonishing efforts to be devoted in getting people to know your work, hoping that effort will lead to business opportunities. The mental and physical challenges one has to endure in the process have forced many dreams to be changed. Financial constraints seem to be the axe that transforms aspiration into desperation.

My moment came in the spring of 1998. It was about one year since I left corporate America. The dream career I was running after seemed like a mirage. The challenges that relegate 90% of all start-up businesses to oblivion in the first year had infested themselves in my efforts. Two to three months would pass easily without a single call from a possible prospect. Forget health insurance and the luxury of paying bills on time.

Then the flyer came. I was invited for an event in Seattle with the potential of speaking to hundreds of thousands and being a guest on a program on the National Public Radio. I could not let this opportunity pass. But it was up to me to pay for my airline travel expenses and be willing to stay with a host family. No problem. I had done it—traveling from Boise, Idaho to Midland, Texas to speak to a library storytelling group and a Toastmaster’s club with no payment agreement besides the opportunity to sell some books.

The program was unfortunately not publicized. The host, bless their hearts, did their very best with what they had and I am grateful for that. In a one-bedroom apartment, I had to share the living room with four dogs that didn’t seem comfortable with a stranger. I have no hidden dislike for dogs. But these dogs became alert and ready to attack at the slightest movement. I resolved not to sleep, and not to be eaten without putting up a fight. This battle of wills between a would-be speaker and dogs lasted for four days and nights.

The trip to the airport from those dogs brought unforgettable comfort. With a bruised ego, four sleepless nights, a depleted wallet and an uncertain speaking future, I was ready to throw in the towel. My wife picked me up at the Boise airport at noon. I had shared my situation as I gave her information about my arrival time the previous night. She took the day off from work and drove to my favorite restaurant. After lunch we went to Ann Morrison Park and relaxed as we reflected on the ebbs and flows of life. There was no discussion about unpaid bills or a career that seemed failing.

By the end of the day, all frustrations and disappointments I had experienced started to lose their grip. I was ready to wake up and go back to the trenches of building a speaking business.

Now, twelve years later, I wonder what might have happened if after feeling like a nobody I came home and my feelings were affirmed by words said to me or actions that reflected negatively on my miseries? That inspiration from my ever-supportive wife refocused my course more than any book or seminar on, “How to be tough in difficult times” could have.

It is the special attention and sense of belonging we receive when we have been wounded in the battles of life that become the source of much needed hope and rekindling of our sinking faith to carry on, just for another day. That’s what makes a difference along the paths we have chosen to travel in life. It is the ingredient that makes an experience a positive memory rather than a graveyard of dreams.


Native of Kenya, Africa, and resident of Idaho since 1992, Vincent has been a featured speaker and trainer at numerous Real Estate conferences and training programs. An award winning speaker and writer, he is one of the less than 7% of all professional speakers to earn a CSP (Certified Speaking Professional), the highest award for professional speakers. Dr. Kituku has worked with championship sports teams and trained leaders on how to inspire productivity all the time. What sets Vincent apart is his ability to weave life experiences in Africa with corporate America and culture in providing solutions for personal and professional growth.

Dr. Vincent Muli Wa Kituku is known as a research-based motivational speaker. He presents motivational keynotes and training programs on leadership, employee motivation, overcoming buffaloes at work (change), customer service and living and working with cultural differences. Vincent is the founder and president of Kituku & Associates, LLC, a business that is dedicated to developing leaders and employees in business and in life.

What has set Dr. Kituku apart is the ability to use his experience in research to evaluate/assess client needs and then tailor his keynotes/training presentation to meet their objectives. Harold G. Delamarter, President/CEO, Prestige Care Inc. said, "Before the Retreat, Dr. Kituku gained as much information as possible about our company and the industry we are involved in. He made telephone calls to management team members to tailor his seminar very closely to the needs of our employees and the circumstances they face each day in the present economy. Dr. Kituku was so widely received in July, the decision was made to ask him to return to again present to our company in October."

Vincent's clients list includes Cisco Systems, Micron, Hewlett Packard, Genworth Financial, US Fish and Wildlife, US Air Force, Women Council of Realtors and National Association of Mental Health. He has been the motivational speaker for the successful Boise State Football Team since 1998. Dr. Kituku works have been featured by numerous publications including the Presentations Magazine, SkyWest Magazine, National Speakers Association Magazine and many newspapers which publish his weekly columns. Vincent holds the Certified Speaking Professional designation that is earned by fewer than 7% of all speakers worldwide.

If results are important to you, then
Dr Vincent Muli Kituku is the speaker/trainer for your group.
Call (208) 376-8724, or email Vincent directly at

Read Dr. Kituku’s newest articles online at:,, Casper Star Tribune, Argus Observer, Business IQ, Post Register, Idaho Catholic Register, Idaho Press Tribune, Idaho Senior Citizen News, and Presentations Magazine.

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